Christmas Gifts For Mom

It’s Christmas time again! The food, the drinks, the office party, with that one really drunk as$hole that everyone talks about until the following Christmas party. Oh, and not to mention the gifts. Christmas is a really good excuse to go all and get your Mom something fantastic. She is the woman who has sacrificed so much for you and I do mean a lot, but we won’t get into all that right now.

Right off the bat, let’s look at Christmas gifts that are directly related to Christmas that your Mom would just love.

The Page Illuminating Cordless Magnifier

This is the tabletop magnifier that illuminates an entire page without being tethered to a power cord.

Noise Reducing Drapes

These are the drapes that reduce the amount of noise entering through a window by up to 40%.

Penis Shaped Egg Fryer

Make some kinky cuisine! The Penis Shaped Egg Fryer is non-stick. Eggciting!

Grill Sergeant Apron

A left described Grill Sergeant will love this apron. With a strap for ammunition to hold beers and pockets for condiments he’ll be ready to grill!

Prescription Coffee Mug

Perfect mug for someone that can’t function without coffee. Also great for hinting that it’s not cool to sleep at the job.

Erupting Volcano Lamp

Tame a volcano or let it tame you! These undersea volcanoes erupt colorful “lava” beads that are mesmerizing to watch

Hand Shovels

These unique sandbox sized dirt machines look and work just like the Big Iron

Mini Construction Materials

Mini Materials are wonderful for kids but they are even more fun for grownups. These would make a great office time waster. These great miniature materials for DIY building will have you switch careers to construction and architecture in no time.

Weener Kleener Soap

Perfect gift for the Valentines day, just make sure he does not get aroused while while using this soap!

Ninja Disguise Shirt

Everyone’s got a little Ninja inside…

Middle Finger Socks

With these socks you don’t need your finger to flip people off.

Sex Panther Spray

Anchorman fans know: It works every time 60% of the time

Tree Man Incense Burner

This tree-man is incredibly expressive, and makes a most unusual incense burner

Electric Twinkie Maker

Can’t get enough twinkies? Have them at your fingertips with this twinkie maker. You may want to purchase a treadmill at the same time, to balance things out.

Solar Powered Cat Tantalizer

Never requiring batteries, this is the cat toy that moves when struck by sunlight, simulating the behavior of prey to tantalize felines for hours.

Liquor/Wine Bottle Lock

Keep kids and others you just don’t want in your alcohol stash.

Bacon Toothpaste

If your dentist’s threats are not going to get you to brush your regularly, the bacon flavored toothpaste most definitely will!

1964 50th Birthday Gift Basket

Go back in time with this retro candy basket. A great gift for those turning the big 50, in 2014. An excellent way for that person to rot their remaining teeth.

Funny Farting Coin Bank

If you enjoy sounds of farts it won’t be free, you’ll have to deposit a coin to enjoy these amazing sounds of nature.

Shirt Tie Napkins

Always look your best at the dinner table with these great napkins that come with a tie printed on them for when you tuck them into your collar.