Christmas maybe over, but I still feel very much in the Christmas mood. I was hoping to get some fun gifts over the season, but nothing quite quenched my thirst, not that the gifts I got weren’t incredibly thoughtful and for the most part very useful. Alas, nothing screamed Christmas to me when I opened it, what ever happened to giving a gift that fit into the theme of Christmas? I want to see Christmas colors of red, green and white, see Santa Clause, reindeer or candy cane designs on the gifts I open. I would’ve even appreciated a fun game to play, games aren’t just for kids.
Christmas is a time to splurge and get things that you normally wouldn’t, besides a time to spend with your loved ones. I can buy myself socks, underwear and any other boring piece of clothing, I want something fun and something that reminds me of Christmas. I don’t want to struggle to remember when I got something, I should be able to look at it and say “I got that for Christmas”, instead of struggling to remember just where it came from. I just want to find myself something great to get for an after Christmas gift.
Here are some of the best:
Asshole Repellent
Feel like you’re always attracting jerks? Bring your asshole repellant with you to keep them away.
Shark Attack Porcelain Mug
Drinking coffee used to be so safe. The only thing you really had to look out for was burning your lips. Alas, now the danger level has been increased tenfold
Prank Pack Crib Dribbler
Get some freedom from your little one with this crib dribbler. Just don’t let Child Protective Services get wind you use one.
Absinthe Soap Bar
Perfect GAG gift for your friend
How’s My Driving? Decal
Funny decal to put on your car an piss off others.
Infant Survival Guide
It’s a treacherous world out there for those without sense of humor. This book will make a perfect present for terrible parents or those who can appreciate pages willed with fun and laughter!
Ninja Disguise Shirt
Everyone’s got a little Ninja inside…
Carstache Classic Black Car Mustache
Your car is powerful. You are powerful. So shouldn’t your car have a powerful mustache?
Mini Shopping Cart Desk Organizer
Organize your desk with this cute mini shopping cart
YouTube Video Shower Curtain
Pretend that you are online and show off all your talent! Make your own famous meme on each showered and surprise your imaginary audience.
Radioactive Waste Drinking Cup
he radioactive waste barrel drinking cup has a radioactive hazard trifoil symbol etched into it
Booger Bin
Great for any nose picker, young or old. A great place to store your buried treasure findings.
Pick Your Nose Paper Cups
Make any party more entertaining with these nose paper cups. A great way to impress people with a new nose, minus the painful recovery and thousands of dollars.
Bacon Flavored Candy Canes
When we told Santa Claus about these Bacon Candy Canes he nearly fell out of his sleigh
Giant Gummy Bear
These gummy behemoths are as sweet, soft, chewy and delicious. And they are bigger than you have ever seen!
Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer
Ever wonder where that persons hands were right before they shook hands with you? Why not offer them a squirt of your maybe you touched your genitals hand sanitizer, just to be safe.
Pizza Circular Saw
Real men don’t use wimpy dime-store pizza wheels
Envelope X-Ray Spray
Are you constantly holding envelopes up to the light to see if you can catch a glimpse inside? This spray will help you pry through peoples mail easier.
Weener Kleener Soap
Perfect gift for the Valentines day, just make sure he does not get aroused while while using this soap!
