Christmas maybe over, but I still feel very much in the Christmas mood. I was hoping to get some fun gifts over the season, but nothing quite quenched my thirst, not that the gifts I got weren’t incredibly thoughtful and for the most part very useful. Alas, nothing screamed Christmas to me when I opened it, what ever happened to giving a gift that fit into the theme of Christmas? I want to see Christmas colors of red, green and white, see Santa Clause, reindeer or candy cane designs on the gifts I open. I would’ve even appreciated a fun game to play, games aren’t just for kids.
Christmas is a time to splurge and get things that you normally wouldn’t, besides a time to spend with your loved ones. I can buy myself socks, underwear and any other boring piece of clothing, I want something fun and something that reminds me of Christmas. I don’t want to struggle to remember when I got something, I should be able to look at it and say “I got that for Christmas”, instead of struggling to remember just where it came from. I just want to find myself something great to get for an after Christmas gift.
Here are some of the best:
Asshole Repellent
Feel like you’re always attracting jerks? Bring your asshole repellant with you to keep them away.
How’s My Driving? Decal
Funny decal to put on your car an piss off others.
Sex Panther Spray
Anchorman fans know: It works every time 60% of the time
The Original RedNek Wine Glass
A great gift for those who are not exactly wine connoisseurs. Enjoy your wine in a stemmed mason jar that combines class and redneck all in one.
Tired Old Ass Survival Kit
Know someone who is in need of some rejuvenation? This will do the trick.
I’ve Never Board Game
Wanna know more about a person? A great way to socialize and have a few cocktails.
Fake Stained Underwear Wallet
The ‘Brief Safe’ is an innovative personal safe that can secure your cash, memory cards, documents, and other small valuables
Scary Shower Curtain
This shower curtain will have you looking twice every time you enter your washroom.
Ugly Christmas Sweater Kit
The original sweater that Santa used to wear back when he was pimping for a living.
Titanic Ice Cube Tray
Have your drinks with style as the titanic shaped ice floats in your drink
Finger Food Plates
Ever been at a party and wondered how you’ll balance you wine glass, hors d’oeuvres and scintillating conversation all at the same time?
Power Nap Head Pillow
This is the head-enveloping pillow that blocks out noise and light to create a private zone for catching a quick power nap.
Ultimate Wine Bottle Glass
Finally no more judgmental looks from family and friends when you continue to refill your glass
Middle Finger Socks
With these socks you don’t need your finger to flip people off.
Farting Santa
Looks like Santa had a few too many bean dishes.
Glow in The Dark Toilet Paper
Now you’ll always be able to find the toilet paper – even in the dark
Butt Face Soap White/Brown
Ever get confused which soap you used for your butt and which one you used on your face? Well, with these soaps you will no longer have to worry about using the soap that you just used on your arse on your face.
Pizza Circular Saw
Real men don’t use wimpy dime-store pizza wheels
Prank Pack Crib Dribbler
Get some freedom from your little one with this crib dribbler. Just don’t let Child Protective Services get wind you use one.
