What Should I Get For My Birthday?

I’m so tired of getting lame gifts for my birthday. There are tons of cool gadgets out there and I never seem to get any of them. I’m wondering what awesome gifts I should get for my birthday?

That’s a difficult thing to figure out, isn’t it? Now I’ve had my fair share of birthdays, I prefer not to disclose how many as I do have a young image to maintain. I myself ponder the exact same question every year and am surprised every year just how many cool gift ideas there are to get. Yes, people’s interests are different but what I’ve learned over the years is that they are an abundance of cool gifts no matter what you’re into.

Here are 50 cool gift ideas for you:

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer

Ever wonder where that persons hands were right before they shook hands with you? Why not offer them a squirt of your maybe you touched your genitals hand sanitizer, just to be safe.

Giant Gummy Bear

These gummy behemoths are as sweet, soft, chewy and delicious. And they are bigger than you have ever seen!

Emergency Radio

Featuring an easy-to-adjust digital tuner that received 33% more radio stations than competing radios and produced crisp, clear sound of AM and FM stations.

Pet Mess Furniture Protector

This is the washable cover that protects furniture from pet hair and damage.

Mechanical Pin Clock

The battery operated pin clock is a mesmerizing bit of high tech gadgetry

Drunk Ambigram Shot Glasses

Upright the glass says Drink. Upturned it says drunk.

Oversized Gear Clock

Pay homage to the industrial revolution with the Southern Enterprises Gear Wall Clock

Solar Charging iPad Case

This is the solar-powered case with an integrated battery that provides up to 10 days of use of an iPad without the need for a charge.

2 Liter Das Glass Beer Boot

This two liter machine pressed beer boot is perfect for the budget minded boot drinker looking for a more durable “Das Boot”

Bacon Flavored Candy Canes

When we told Santa Claus about these Bacon Candy Canes he nearly fell out of his sleigh

The Only Whole House Weather Alert System

A weather alert system that provides alarms for multiple rooms in a house. Dorothy really could’ve used one of these.

Zombie Head Cookie Jar

Delicious chocolate chips braiinnnz

Magnetic Light Switch Cover

Powered by incredibly strong magnets, this magnet light switch cover can easily grip onto your house keys

Freeze-Dried Miso Soup

Can’t get enough miso soup or maybe someone you know can’t? Get your fill of miso soup with this gift.

Beer Opening Sandal

Open your bees with style using these beer opening sandals

Zombie Beanie

Zombie Beanie. A Fun stocking style cap for Halloween!

Fogless Mirror

Tired of you mirror fogging up in the shower? Shave with ease.

Jewelry Holder Tree

Provide a place for jewelry collection to grow. Each branch and leaf has been sculpted to hold rings, bracelets and necklaces, creating a well-ornamented tree

Color Changing Pillow

Mood lighting doesn’t come much softer than this.

Facebook Style Like and Dislike Stamps

Self-inking stamps good for up to 5,000 assertions Cardboard packaging measures 6.5 (H) x 7.5 (W) x 1.3 (D) Each stamp is approximately 3 (H) x 2.5 (W) x 1.5 (D) The Like & Dislike Stamps come as a set In collaboration with Nation Studio UK

Children’s Flameless Fireworks

This is the set of four fireworks that create their own dazzling light displays and sound effects without the use of flame.

Family Emergency Survival Kit

A must have for anyone who likes to be prepared for the worst.

iCrayon Stylus Pen

iCrayon Stylus Pen, perfect for drawing on Tablets

Sunny Side Up Egg Mold

Shine Some light onto your Breakfast table with this silicon egg shaper that will make your plate a work of art

V For Vendetta Mask

V for Vendetta Mask, perfect for those with thirst for justice.

Total Body Support Pillow

Providing an extraordinary level of comfort, this pillow gives optimum support for upper and lower extremities, while cushioning and maintaining proper spinal alignment no matter your sleep position.

My Family Cookbook

Are you constantly stuck trying to figure out where you put that recipe? Keep all your recipes conveniently stored in this cookbook.

National Lampoons Glass Moose Mug

Anyone who’s a fan of this classic Christmas movie will absolutely love this mug.

The Official Bullshit Button

This straight-talking Bullshit Button allows you to call bullshit whenever you see it! Simply press the red buzzer to make it light up, buzz loudly and announce, That was bullshit!

Light Up Shutter Shades

21st Century Spin on retro shutter glasses

Perverted Garden Gnome

What’s more fun than a garden gnome? A perverted garden gnome! Will make a good office desk decoration!

Staircase Basket

Stop tripping over stuff on the stairs. Collect it neatly in this naturally beautiful Seagrass Stair Basket

USB Paper Towel Holder

Find yourself always searching for an outlet to plug in your devices? Look no further.

Bigfoot Statue

When you cant find the real deal for your back yard, get the next best thing with the Bigfoot the Yeti Garden Statue

LED Lights Faucet Sprayer Nozzle

This no battery needed lighted faucet lights up the water based on temperature. Nothing short of amazing.

Eau De Playdoh (Cologne)

Smell like a champion with the Eau De Playdoh cologne

Ugly Christmas Sweater Kit

The original sweater that Santa used to wear back when he was pimping for a living.

Wall Clock With Hidden Safe

Keep your valuables hidden in this wall clock safe. Perfect for every room in your home and office.

Lightning Bolt Power Strip

The bright yellow bolt power strip is a fun and clever alternative to an everyday outlet

Welcoming Doormat

Funny/Rude Doormat that is guaranteed to make your visitors laugh

Rechargeable Heated Insoles

Tired of ice cold feet? Keep them toasty all winter long.

Alarm Sounding Beach Safe

This is the portable safe that sounds a piercing alarm when the security cable is cut, so you can store your valuables and enjoy the beach or pool without worry.

Portable Propane Coffeemaker

Get your coffee fix, regardless if you’re in the middle of the forest.

Hugg-a-Planet

Hugg-A-Planet is a perfect gift for the environmentalist hippie friend or someone who really loves our planet.

Doctor Who’s Remote Control

This Earth-safe television remote control replicates the famous Sonic Screwdriver from the BBC’s beloved Doctor Who series.

The iPad Commode Caddy

This is the bathroom stand that replaces a traditional basket of magazines by accommodating both an iPad and a roll of toilet paper. Keep yourself entertained while dropping the kids off at the pool.

Ultimate Wine Bottle Glass

Finally no more judgmental looks from family and friends when you continue to refill your glass

Crystal Skull Shotglass

The crystal skull shot glass for wicked parties

Royal Family Tea Bag Gift Set

These are the tea bags if you’d like to drink tea with the royalty. Make sure to maintain eye contact as you sip.